How to be a better gay top
What Does “Top” Mean?
In the context of gay relationships and sexual dynamics, terms such as “top”, “bottom”, “verse” and “side” are often used to depict a person’s sexual preferences and roles. It is crucial to knowing these terms not only for members of the LGBTQ+ group, but also for increasing understanding and acceptance of homosexual relationships in society.
What Does “Top” Mean?Physical AspectsEmotional and Psychological AspectsCommunication and ConsentWhat Does “Bottom” Mean?Physical AspectsEmotional and Psychological AspectsThe Stigma Around Being a BottomWhat Does “Verse” Mean?Accepting DiversityCommunication and CompatibilityWhat Does “Side” Mean?Non-Penetrative IntimacyOpposing NormsAccepting One’s IdentityRoles and MythsHealth and Safety During Gay Sex
As a rule, in lgbtq+ sexual relationships, the “top” is the partner who has a penetrative role during anal sex. However, the idea of top includes much more than just physical actions: it includes a whole set of attitudes, preferences, and sometimes emotional roles.
Physical Aspects
In physical terms, the t
What Gay and Bi Men Really Want
Are physical and sexual attraction the most appealing qualities in a partner? Or are unseen qualities like good manners and reliability the most attractive?
Following on from his research into what direct women want and what straight men want, D&M Research’s managing director Derek Jones has taken the next logical step with his latest study into what gay and bi(sexual) men want.
In order to dig deeper and tug out a true list of turn-ons and turn-offs for gay and bi men, Derek once again used of the Im-Ex Polygraph method. He originally devised this method of analysis to distinguish what people say they want from brands, products or services from what they really want by comparing stated versus derived measures of importance.
Qualities the queer and bi men said they desired in a partner (‘stated’) were compared to the qualities display in example celebrities they nominated as attractive (‘implied’). The same comparison was made between stated and implied negative qualities, to determine what attributes are really the biggest turn-offs.
Top, Bottom, Verse: A Definitive Guide to Gay Terminologies
Gay culture is incredibly affluent and diverse and has a language all its own. Though the Internet has helped to diminish the sense of isolation that many gay people may have felt in the past, there&#;s still a certain code to online gay culture.
Understanding a not many basic gay terminologies, especially ones that will support you learn how to better communicate with homosexual men, can help you get more out of your online dating experience.
So whether you&#;re an aged pro or just launch to learn about queer sex, here is a look at some of the most common lgbtq+ terminologies as we donate you the low-down on the difference between superior, bottom, and versatile
What Are the Gay Male Identities?
The most common gay male identities are Top, Bottom, and Verse. The definitions of each are relatively self-explanatory:
- The top is the person in charge and/or performing the sexual act.
- The bottom is the person taking control and/or receiving the sexual act.
- The verse is someone who can go either way. They are the sexual chameleons of the gay
It’s important to remember this applies to yourself, as well — as we talked about above, tops also have limits, and can also be triggered or harmed during sex. You possess the right to stop or withdraw consent from sex at any time, and also possess the right to feel terrible about something happening during sex; if that happens, you’re entitled to support and space from your partner as well.
How to Be a Good Top
You understand what topping, bottoming (and even switching!) are now — and maybe you’re feeling super thrilled to top (or to grasp more about the vocabulary for something you’ve already been doing for years). But there’s more to sex than knowing the right terminology. You know you want to top, but how do you make sure you’re a good top?
Sex and love affair are subjective, and every meeting with every person is a little different; what makes the dreamiest, most mindblowing sex of one person’s life might be a total snoozefest for someone else. While there may be no objective standards for “good sex,” I do think there are some ground rules for what individual people can carry out to be good in bed —